An unwanted break up can be hard on you: physically, emotionally, and mentally too. The most common reaction to your boyfriend dumping you is the same everywhere around the world: hopelessness, despair, feeling depressed and completely miserable. You're certainly not alone, and entitled to feel this way. However, wallowing in post-breakup misery isn't going to help you get your boyfriend back.
Too many women immerse themselves in a hopelessly depressed role. They're not seeking pity, but they often find it... and pity can sometimes feel good. But while being comforted by this pity, either through friends or family, what you're really doing is pushing yourself further and further away from your exboyfriend. Because as much as the crying works in making those who love you feel badly for your situation, it doesn't help in making your ex want to date you again. And in fact, it has an opposite effect.
Negativity is unattractive, all-around. By submerging yourself in the hopelessness of your current situation, you're giving off bad vibes. In short, no guy wants to take back a miserable crying wreck of an exgirlfriend. Instead of embracing the negative aspects of your break up, you should be pushing past it and into a more positive frame of mind. Grab a piece of paper and write out all the good things being single will bring to your life. For example, you'll have more time to yourself, you can take up new (and old) hobbies, you can spend lots more time with friends and family. You can go new places and meet new people, and you can do things that might not have been possible with a boyfriend at your side.
They say living well is the best revenge... and it's also one of the best ways of getting your ex boyfriend's attention again. Imagine his reaction: instead of sitting home upset and crushed as he expects you to be, you're out laughing it up and having a great time - as if the end of your relationship hasn't affected you at all. Try to think back to the beginning of your relationship and remember what made you attractive to your boyfriend in the first place. You were probably fun, funny, and irresistible. These are traits that guys go after... so what makes you think your ex will take you back if all you're doing is hanging back in desperation and misery? The answer is he won't.
Creating sparks is what made your boyfriend date you in the first place, so concentrate on making those sparks fly once again. Maybe not between you and him - you'll need to give him some space first - but between you and anyone you interact with. This doesn't mean you should date or flirt with other guys specifically to make your ex jealous, but it does mean you shouldn't hinder or limit yourself simply because you want your ex back. Remember that he broke up with you, so you're under no obligation to follow any rules or regulations that might be lingering in your mind after your break up. The best rule to follow is that you should be having fun, moving forward, and trying not to think about your ex boyfriend. Do this right, and he's going to immediately notice it... and start thinking about you again.
Over time, the fact that you jumped right back into the saddle will be attractive to your ex. He'll realize that maybe you didn't rely on him as much as he figured. You've got your own life, friends, and independent spirit. This might've been something he didn't see in you during the final weeks of your relationship, and maybe he missed it. Chances are you missed it too. By looking your best and letting him know you're enjoying life, you're also giving him a good view of what he's missing out on if he continues the break up.
This will cause your ex to make a choice: go back out with you again, or risk losing you completely. If he's got any love left in his heart from you (and odds are good that he does), your ex will begin taking steps back in your direction. Allowing him to think getting back together is his idea is crucial to making your new relationship last when the two of you do build a future together again.
Too many women immerse themselves in a hopelessly depressed role. They're not seeking pity, but they often find it... and pity can sometimes feel good. But while being comforted by this pity, either through friends or family, what you're really doing is pushing yourself further and further away from your exboyfriend. Because as much as the crying works in making those who love you feel badly for your situation, it doesn't help in making your ex want to date you again. And in fact, it has an opposite effect.
Negativity is unattractive, all-around. By submerging yourself in the hopelessness of your current situation, you're giving off bad vibes. In short, no guy wants to take back a miserable crying wreck of an exgirlfriend. Instead of embracing the negative aspects of your break up, you should be pushing past it and into a more positive frame of mind. Grab a piece of paper and write out all the good things being single will bring to your life. For example, you'll have more time to yourself, you can take up new (and old) hobbies, you can spend lots more time with friends and family. You can go new places and meet new people, and you can do things that might not have been possible with a boyfriend at your side.
They say living well is the best revenge... and it's also one of the best ways of getting your ex boyfriend's attention again. Imagine his reaction: instead of sitting home upset and crushed as he expects you to be, you're out laughing it up and having a great time - as if the end of your relationship hasn't affected you at all. Try to think back to the beginning of your relationship and remember what made you attractive to your boyfriend in the first place. You were probably fun, funny, and irresistible. These are traits that guys go after... so what makes you think your ex will take you back if all you're doing is hanging back in desperation and misery? The answer is he won't.
Creating sparks is what made your boyfriend date you in the first place, so concentrate on making those sparks fly once again. Maybe not between you and him - you'll need to give him some space first - but between you and anyone you interact with. This doesn't mean you should date or flirt with other guys specifically to make your ex jealous, but it does mean you shouldn't hinder or limit yourself simply because you want your ex back. Remember that he broke up with you, so you're under no obligation to follow any rules or regulations that might be lingering in your mind after your break up. The best rule to follow is that you should be having fun, moving forward, and trying not to think about your ex boyfriend. Do this right, and he's going to immediately notice it... and start thinking about you again.
Over time, the fact that you jumped right back into the saddle will be attractive to your ex. He'll realize that maybe you didn't rely on him as much as he figured. You've got your own life, friends, and independent spirit. This might've been something he didn't see in you during the final weeks of your relationship, and maybe he missed it. Chances are you missed it too. By looking your best and letting him know you're enjoying life, you're also giving him a good view of what he's missing out on if he continues the break up.
This will cause your ex to make a choice: go back out with you again, or risk losing you completely. If he's got any love left in his heart from you (and odds are good that he does), your ex will begin taking steps back in your direction. Allowing him to think getting back together is his idea is crucial to making your new relationship last when the two of you do build a future together again.
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